Stay for awhile and be a damm

Thoughts?

2009-05-28T19:50:00.002+08:00

Been through 3 years in SMU,
all the halter and skelter was just great coupled with my own biz ... enjoyed.
However some concerns surfaced recently, fretting yet I want to solve.
High expectations I have for myself whenever I take on certain roles/jobs/tasks.
However, for my internship now, I do not see myself completing the registrations for them and that's a downer for me.
As for fyp, communication channels are kinda failing and some upsets among the group.
Haiz ...
I don't know how to go about now coz it is really simply demoralizing.
For fyp, resolved, placated and it's gonna go on and my wish is for all in the team to go on learning more and getting a good grade at the end of journey ... that's my resolution.
For internship ... my concerns will be raised to my immediate superior and see how we can go on from there.
At the moment, it is just plain disappointment for me for I really take a very firm stand on my expectations and performances.

... Sigh~~~

In loving memory of my granny

2009-02-28T08:21:00.003+08:00

She is a wonderful and doting grandma, who has suffered in the past few years.
I will no longer be able to call upon her from now as eternity has taken her this morning at 07:04.
Through the years, she showered her love on me. Concerns and gestures, simple yet heartfelt.
In respect, my dad is a role model for how he took on the responsibilities as a son to my grandma.
Grandma, take care and good bye ... 28 Feb 2009 07:04

2009-02-11T01:23:00.002+08:00

Hidden in the realms, there lies the anxiety.
A subtle crawl on the skin.
That minute, it suffice to cause flutters and halts to the heart.
How then, should it be suppressed?

Through the ages, it played and toyed with the mind.
Causing ill aftermath each time it is done.
A partner in crime and just, nothing but mere stimulant for dreadful thoughts.
Nothing broods ill from it alone, yet with the coupling circumstances it is a devil.
Beckoning the appearance of a calming hero,
No one answers the calls but only yourself,
Trying to twist its effects from being an adversary to a beneficial friend.

Accept its presence and sense its pleads,
for it is just a barrier to a stronger self.
Hold faith in your abilities and then Anxiety is nothing but mere dust.

CNY Spree

2009-01-25T20:56:00.004+08:00

havent been updating lately ...

hahaha well hopefully a new year means more regular updates lol

wanted to buy quite a lot of stuffs for the new year ... yet I could only managed to find a bag, t-shirt and a bums.

sheesh ... I wanna shop more!!

My bag and bums

My t-shirt's front design

Hope everyone will have a great lunar new year ...

Credits to min yuan ... hahaha make my blog alive right ... thanks ms march baby ... hahhaa

2009-01-03T04:42:00.001+08:00

Enough

2008-10-22T23:44:00.003+08:00

Think I had did enough, done enough ... period
Time to not think about much and have a hiatus.

The long road that winded my soul,
drained all the vitality that lasted for a mere second.
All that is left were bitter futile sweat.
Smell that stung the nose and heat that burned the skin.
Leaving wilderness with a lifeless corpse.

Each day as nature takes its toil,
the flesh starts to leave the bones.
The carcass deprived of its blood and soul,
laid defenseless to its fate.
Beyond the shadow cast by the sun, a future neither seen nor loved.

What a week

2008-10-14T12:16:00.005+08:00

For the week of 6th till 12th of this month, well how hectic n fun it was ...
hahaha suddenly i have 一条底裤s ... ah jun n wei ming ... hahaha ... dun say i nv include you guys in my blog.

Basketball, a break from sch ... with papers to study for though.
It was really a much required break for me. Comparatively, this year the stress that surmounted on me is much higher than my previous terms and having a little breather does help.

Prawn fishing day.
The big PRAWN
Jun with the big pincer ... =.= it's almost as long as his arm

Hmmm luckily I got a few fun events to let off, not in a pretty good shape recently ... but I will pick myself up and get moving again ...

For in this world, we are bound to have wounds but if we were to not heal from it and move on, we are not living. What is a world devoid of sadness and pain, it will just be a desolated planet. In my opinion, to put it simply in Chinese or rather Mandarin -
没有悲哪来的喜，没有痛哪来的乐?
Agreeable?

My thoughts

2008-07-08T02:57:00.005+08:00

This is adapted from a song, the lyrics reflects on how I feel now ... :)

我看不开也放不开
因为我曾见过爱情真的盛开
我要等待一直等待
等那一个夜晚从回忆回来
当你拥抱着我那一瞬间
我像飞到空中
而当我缓缓降落我不再是我
我有了梦我在梦中

寂寞喧哗我不害怕
因为我只听得见对你的牵挂
世界很大会容得下
我这小小傻傻顽固的信仰
你有没有过承诺我已忘了
那已不重要了
反正我都会守候在梦中守候
我最唯一最美的梦
我就是要等你回来
如果需要动用奇迹来召唤回你
就让泪蒸发下成雪花
和我一起在爱中被融化

爱来过
来得那么美那么凶
欢呼着从我生命狠狠辗过
连遗憾也都不争气的
珍惜成笑容

爱来过
让我完整过幸福过
怎么能轻易就放它走
我不想解脱我只怕错过
我就是要等你回来爱我

Hurt

2008-07-07T00:44:00.002+08:00

Lost through the weeks of silence and torment,
Pain engraves deeply into the senses,
with no one to talk to or relate,
there is only one lonely path.

Affected I am by issues,
yet beneath a mask i wore a smile,
trying hard not to ponder into darkness,
the more I tries, the harder it gets.

Let it go I told myself,
the inner voice resonates in me,
unable to for sinking deep,
Lost and hurt is what I am.

first week

2008-05-04T02:54:00.003+08:00

Hmmm well after a week being an intern, I must admit it's tough but fulfilling ... the daily hassle, thoughts, interactions and delivering of my recommendations.
Totally drained me of my brains ... hahhaa hopefully I will be able to finish what they expects me within the 2 months of internship ... the constant stress and ever-nearing deadline down my neck ... makes things and pace that unbreathable ... but I will forge on as I have always done.

Digressing
hmmm random thoughts hahaha ... somethings are just not meant to be ... then just let it be then ... no point harping , no point fretting right? ... carry on, trot forward~~

Back to internship
After a week, I hope for all my frds that are interning will have a challenging but doable internship ... any things or problems, my door is always open ... we can go out to de-stress, chat , a couple of drinks ... whatever u deem fit ya

Internship

2008-04-27T14:40:00.002+08:00

Well tml will be my first day at the supply chain department of philip morris as an intern,
feelings now ... well kinda looking forward to it but somehow there is this deep down indifferent in me.
Not much of a break for me, just a week of rest, doing nothing after exams.
Sent bryant just this monday, well around 7 of them flew overseas for internship ... hahhaa
what a summer break this is gonna be
Outlook for the break, interning, basketball training, fyp and perhaps going out a little here and there.
Time really flies, looking upon the 2 years I spent in SMU, fruitful and well ... gotta know a few great pals like lian, bry, ch ... the list goes on ...
hee
Considering each year there is only approx. 30 weeks of studies ... it's really fast
that's about it for now ... more rantings to come when I start interning then :)

Supper of week 14

2008-04-13T07:06:00.002+08:00

Well revisions are ongoing like mad
but still we took time for supper
my first time joining them at jalan kayu
woot but worth it
nice place nice food
hahaha reminiscences of the past ... yeah
had nasi goreng ayam ... while someone had the infamous or rather
stated to be superb maggi goreng
home at 3am too full to carry on with revision
prolific time ... arghhh and I lost all the matches to mercy and zi xian
zzzz 4 am stop playing a fool time to get back to task at hand ...
hahaha 7 am blogging time and soon it will be basketball then off to sch for more studying

2008-04-05T04:21:00.009+08:00

time to post ... hahaha been awhile ya

busy with school ... assignments projects and upcoming exams kinda driving me crazy ... but anyway all have been well
hmmm had a ok night ... caught up with some friends at ICB for paul's birthday

haiz ... feeling kinda down kinda vexed now dunno why ... guess it's one of those nights

hahaha here's something i cooked myself once again ... lightly sauced garlic chicken breast ... looks nice right?
well had a good birthday this year, went to caught a long awaited show

yeah ... step up 2 ... hahaha the moves alone will be worth the ticket price

who i caught it with?

hahaha heere ... figure out yourself ya ... lol

After which was dinner with my family and they bought me ice cream cake and loads of gifts ... hahaha 23 liao ... getting old ... ahaha but still i feel young ... ha

2008-03-12T09:22:00.002+08:00

before bud kick my poor bums , here I am relating our ktv outing 29 feb...

hehe was a fun one to go, meeting bud's beau for the first time and catching up with her since god knows when ...

hmmm wanna write more but i dun have the pics !! bud upload them soon ... haha well hopefully we can meet up soon and not like once after a very long time ... lol

2008-03-04T21:59:00.003+08:00

The Leap Years

this is a heart warming, tears tweaking show for couples. It has a good plot with excellent actors in terms of expressing their emotions and narrating the story, though qi yi wu might be less accomplished in acting, he still did well. The show transits from the present to the past couple of times and might be confusing for some initially but it does well by linking them for the understanding. Sobs and weeps were heard and seen at the theatre while i was watching the show and this is one of the most achieved romantic show in Singapore ... Must catch ~~ more about the show can be learned by clicking on the picture above linking to the official site of the Show.

2008-03-03T17:26:00.004+08:00

This was my mess one early morning ... haha looks really bad but it was fantastic ~~~

Fried rice with luncheon meat slices wraped in an omelette, sauteed with tomato cheese sauce ... hahah

hmmm am in sch today after a week of break ... well still feeling nua ... same sentiments, anyone?

outlook for the week can be summarised in one word : hell

hahaha but still i love SMU ... hahah see ya ppl~~

posting again finally~~~

2008-02-28T04:19:00.003+08:00

hmmm ... after so long guess it's time to blog again ... shall make it a point to at least blog a week

a new term, new year, time to be even more hardworking... haha perhaps been thru loads and it's time to do more achieve more , for crying out loud by friends * it's about time u do that * hahah

hmmm having a week of break before the build up of speed and dash to the end of the term ... hahaha

well, life has been good to me for chinese new year, loads of fun~~

catching up with friends and lotsa ktv sessions ... hmmm though there is one that I am awaiting for to meet up and go up... hahaha

what has smu trained me to do , maintaining long hours of working without sleep ... haha manageable attention with 4 hours of ample sleep ... haha I feel more aware of what to do and friends that I really like to have till the end ... :)

sleepy

2007-08-17T06:54:00.000+08:00

Morning, ha ... another insomnia night for me ... been having loads on my mind recently
one very heavy one is that I said too many times the same words to someone but in the end it just turns out to be a facade of truth. I spun a myth ... it 's been on me that words aint just for saying ... I am really sorry but it's hard for someone to forgive when it's been so many times ...
School's gonna be starting next week, mixed feelings now but time to get busy
It's going to be a uphill task for me to manage my time, here we go ... weeee
No point trying, it's either u do it or u flop ... Just do it ... like nike says ... haha
Reminds me of the team name I chose the other time for a 3 on 3 competition , JustPlay ... lol
Time to get prepared and head down to nus ...
PS I wont say it anymore less I can fulfil ... take care then ... See you

update

2007-07-12T16:27:00.000+08:00

Did some craft work yst, feel so rusty now ha i spent 4 hours on the thing and in the end it came out only as acceptable on my standard ... hopefully it will cheer someone a little... haha

3 impending tasks at hand now,
first my mic virtuoso event site it an uphill rush to complete it in time and I am just rushing and rushing and rushing to try and get it up in time.. with so many elements involved it's kinda hard to piece the whole site in time

second, my studies; the planning and the bidding kinda crazy thinking of what to bid who to be in class with how many days per week to be in sch then assessing whether i can cope and do well ... owellos just gotta dig down to do it

third is the sudden change of the ivp schedule it has been pushed forward, meaning the slacking me gotta condition up for competion ... how it just means gyming, running and training more each week haa ... in my 4 yrs in smu i want a medal ... recently starting an exercise call the air alert to improve my vertical it's really a useful programme but crazy as well ...

how have u guys been doing? been well ma ... let me know on the chatbox la

tired

2007-07-08T04:35:00.000+08:00

Here I am on a sunday morning feeling really exhausted by the events at home. I am really tired with the constant rubbing about me with issues of my family...
I feel really pressed down by their suspicions and accusations at me ... there's nothing i can do nor explanations that i can make...
haiz ... let's put it as just me being down on my luck and family is there to bring it to a major low ...
hiding in my room nor facing them doesn't help ... when will it end i don't know
I still love them as my family but it is just too much to handle at times ...
pershap i should just stay away from home for a few days to quieten down ... i know confronting them will only make it worse but taking a step back while i am still home doesn't help as well ...
another week past ... looking back haven't been doing much this week ... just eagerly awaiting for the monday to arrive and i will be able to plan for my year 2 term 1 ... hehe update u all again then ... =p

early post

2007-06-26T09:43:00.000+08:00

haven't been doing much recently, haa yst i just collapsed into my bed real early . hmmm ard 10 plus i guess ... and i woke up at ard 6 am ... real early ... nth much to do ... played some game, watched a couple of animes. Now heading for my jog, haa ... Nua lifestyle for this week.

Next week will be a start of a partly working partly doing some stuffs for my cca till aug. School term is like so far away yet it feels so near ... Guess the rest has been enough for me to start the term again.

like to really go out sometimes but dunno what is there to do.. i reckon if the company is right ... it's nt about doing anything it's the time spent tgt with them ... haa ... take care then off to my jog now ... today's target from my house area to bukit batok nature reserve up to cashew and back home ... hopefully i can cover the distance ... haven't been running much lately ... =p

glued to ball?

2007-06-19T23:15:00.000+08:00

Hmmm been asking myself is this a extreme bball week for me? ... Played ball yst at ntu with friends, major exercise and fun manz ... haha five on five till i almost drop dead there. Poor Lyon had a bad day ... nt his usual winning ways ... was fun with all the touches I exchanged with ben ... hope can play with them more ... so hard to join them nowadays ...

today i wanted to just rest at home to relax after settling some issues, in my most relax hour little did i expect, gay to call me and ask to play ball with him ... so I went and drag myself home ... haiz clumsy me lo ... walk walk walk then had my left leg into the drain and sprained it slightly. Oh well, relax relax ... lucky it's kinda light so hopefully i will be fine tml for another ball night.

Haha ... thurs will huang hui(Ah cai) jio us to nus for ball ... considering whether to go not ... if i do will be playing ball on a daily basis this week ... haha

Friday usual smu night ball playing

Saturday ... gombak playing ...

Sunday ... nt sure yet ... hopefully my rest day ... haa

really a ball week ... lol

Weekend

2007-06-17T03:20:00.000+08:00

Well, let's start with friday ... a disastrous start to a day of total exhaustion ... went to work and had 2 ppl on MC . Oh ... how fun with the workload ... while doing, my ever empty stomach howl and growl at me. Apart from my constant battle with the invoices and calls, there was the hunger and the harsh weather ... haha heavy rain made my office so damn cold. So I endured till yAy! lunch time, the rain had stopped and my appetite was huge ... rice and mee manz ... haa after a hearty meal ... went on stroll back with the usual fan hou yi geng yan ... that got me really pissed as a car went past the puddle of water and wet my pack ... no more yan ... very gek sim new pack somemore. Hmmm in between till end of work ... was just nua ing chatting ... crawling thru the work ... haa

ended work, time for my friday night basketball, before doing so. Went to do so errands and bouught some flowers. Tulips ... why tulips ... hmm i felt that they will cheer her up and lighten her room ... wanted something different from the roses and tulips were the first on my mind ... haa

Basketball was so fun but exhausting ... haiz but everytime da desmond will take my height to yu le everyone ... sian half ... haa don't really mind la ... but don't everytime ma ... burn ur asses then u know ... haa ... after a fun session of bball with my mates and long time familiar jefferey. we went holland v for supper before a quite lang bei trip home ... nt enough cash, frightening last bus and a long walk home ... haha hopefully i did passed zheng long enough for him to take from batok to his home ...

Now to nuaing sat, slept the whole day with the rain disrupting my plans . Nice long slumber with a sweet dream ... haha then woke up in a fluster as I was required at my friend's bday function... haha rushed over and had some food and catching up with the mic mates ... haha played the usual mic game -BANG! . Well alan improve on your tactics la ... first to die all the time ... haha really happy to have won the game when my role is the renegade ... Happy birthday , Jia Qi!! ...
haha Alright time for me to collapse ... nitex ppl

Brand new

2007-06-15T08:46:00.000+08:00

here we go ... my 3rd blog ... starting anew again ... well , 1st that I used was my space ... nt much complain but it did screw up at times and the html and javascript support wasn't fanatic. It ran my patience to the limits with it so I switched to friendster's own. Haa and i recieved lotsa complain saying it was too dull just words, no layout no nothing ... fine so here i am with my third blog ... hopefully this will be a permanent stay ... hehe

Am now at work , while waiting for the clock to hit 9 am , decided to utilise the free time to blog. I hope much awaits me in the remaining of my hols. Well most prob, next week will be my last week here... we shall see ya ... haa

gotta run now ... be sure to be in for more bitching in the days to come ... haa ...